Any advice for dating a girl who has child to another man?

help. having a bad day and just wondering if people out there experience the same. been dating girl for year and is the best. so in love with each other. but i cant shake feeling down when i think that the love of my life has a child to this other guy. they never were really together and barely talk now but he sees his child (rightfully) couple of times a week. any advice on how to distance myself from feeling bad about all this. i mean, its been a year and i still get random ';bad'; days. how can i stop feeling down over this? they ahve shared this life changing event and its tought to take, even though they hate each other and were never a couple. we have talked many times and i know it annoys her (it should, i mean, i should be ok after a year right?). any advice?Any advice for dating a girl who has child to another man?
Many men take on the role of stepdad every year. Unfortunately, far to many fail. I was raised by my stepfather. Here's something I wrote about him for Dear Abby.


http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/?uc_ful鈥?/a>





As for whether you SHOULD is another matter.





I recommend that all men, and women, who are considering being a stepparent take the time to answer a series of questions produced by a professor at the U of Missouri in Columbia. It's a stepparent work sheet. You answer the questions and review your answers using their guide. You can find it in the file section of Dads House in Yahoo Groups.





http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/Dad鈥?/a>


Any advice for dating a girl who has child to another man?
u can't change the situation but u can change your perspective towards it. so change how u see the situation. i don't see any reason for u to worry she has no feelings towards the kids father that makes it so much easier for u. u r probably feeling jealous of the kid or the fact that another man gave her a baby. not much advice we can give u on how to feel but just try to look at it in a different light.
she might just like have ing sex with men, i would make sure that you wear your comdom, so you don't become the next hated guy who knocked her up
Too many women do this: get pregnant by the sexy dude who's great on the dance floor and has a 'bad' reputation, then 'grow up', 'settle down' i.e. stop being promiscuous, and seek a good, reliable man as husband material. They expect him to take on the job of raising another man's child without any consideration that men don't like this and typically want children of their own.





In nature there are many species the male of which would summarily kill the infant/s and impregnant the female himself so your feelings of unease, while primitive, are as natural as jealousy, lust, or any other emotional response.





Personally, I wouldn't raise another man's child on principle. The father has a parental duty - and if the mother chose an unreliable man that's her problem. She made the bed - she can lie in it.





Another reason I'd never so much as date a single mother is that you're guaranteed to come second in her life behind the kid. That'd be cool if it was *your* kid but you'll never be comfortable when it isn't.





Furthermore, she'll never be *your* woman - you'll have to share her with 'him' for the rest of your life. He'll always have rights to visit his child; she - and thus YOU - will always have to accomodate 'him' every month. His shadow will be there as a constant reminder that 'your' woman was with him before you, and bore his child, and that HIS flesh and blood is being fed, and clothed, and protected, and raised by you - you're doing the hard work and his genes will live on.





Not for me. Is it for you?